No period for spring break; use this wisely.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
i think we sleep fucked last night...
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
