Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
