Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Randomize