Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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