these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
We got so high we made milksteak
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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