but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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