he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
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