In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
