please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
