He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
your room smells of hookers.
And success
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
