I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
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