just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
