i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
