i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize