when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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