I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
