No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
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