Screwed.edu
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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