Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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