I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize