Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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