i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
