Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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