I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
