I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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