i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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