susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize