Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Randomize
