So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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