I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
