Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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