YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
