He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Don't EVER smell your tampon
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
