His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I think I just sharted jello shots
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