remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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