I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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