Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
