: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize