It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
