I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
