Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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