Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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