is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
