You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
this just has baby written all over it
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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