saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
