Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
