Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
