I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
