real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
