Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
