do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
